TUESDAY, JUNE 7, 2011
Mood - I felt groggy when I woke up. I woke up around 12:00 pm to my telephone alarm. I took both the allergy medication and the excedrin migraine. My period started Saturday night very, very light. I felt much better and human after I took the pills and lay down for a few minutes but I was still groggy and wanted to sleep more.
Physical - I went to bed last night at 4:00 am. I had small headaches all day yesterday. I was groggy and kind of lousy feeling all day. I can smell things really intensely, the mold on the bagels smells like chemical, my sneezes smell disgustingly musky (mold in my sinuses?) and my blood smells horrible (from p.).
Woke up - I woke up at 12:00 pm. I plan on getting up at 9:00 am tomorrow.
Activities - I got up around 12:00 pm. I went to pee. I was planning on going to Erika's house to finish the wallpaper but Mom asked me to stick around since she has a 2:30 pm appointment and Dad has Nancy coming. I went downstairs and had a fish and horseradish sauce sandwich. Mom went to Something Fishy and got a pond liner. She went after her skating lessons. Mom's appointment is a pre-checkup before the cataract surgery. Ofelia called me and she wasn't doing so well still. Yesterday she had a breathing treatment for a bronchitis condition. She's going to Texas then to Arizona in two weeks to see family.
I worked on "Defining Bipolar Disorder". Nancy came and gave Dad his shower. When Mom was making dinner she came upstairs and asked if I could get some salsa at Cumberland Farms gave me $10 and the "key" to her car. Good thing because K. must have taken my car into work since it was gone. I also picked up 2 bags of TGIF chips and a diet Mountain Dew.
Mom and I ate the chicken she grilled outside along with broccoli, a green salad, the chips and salsa I got. We then went for a walk to Galilee and George's Beach after I cleared the table. I came back and went on line.
{I plan on writing down family stories on the off chance that they might be interesting enough to publish. I started with the Germans and the Horseradish. I can look at my past journals where I've written down thoughts among my appointments and reminders.
Mom and I got Mrs.Tyler's invitation to John's Memorial. Initially I wasn't going to go because I don't forgive Mrs. Tyler for gypping me the $500 and I don't like her as a person. I went to John's burial for myself as a way to end anything emotional I felt about him. I'd let anything I cared about him go a long time ago which is why I didn't see him while he was living here before he died. Temporarily I felt guilty for not calling or visiting him once. Fact is that he and his mother used me for cleaning and tasks. I convinced myself that John and I would get married. Once I actually considered the situation: that I would be related to Mrs. Tyler a very manipulative and nasty person who had no problem using me and my family for her benefit and a person that had no problem not paying me back what she owed me and then tried to make me feel guilty for it, and John a person that was emotionally needy and didn't take care of his health at all plus allowed himself to be his mother's pawn, I decided that I didn't need to encourage depression in my life by tying myself to them. In addition my sons didn't like them nor did my family. I will go to the Memorial because 1) I would want someone who cared about me once to go to my funeral, 2) Mom is going, 3) I will not have to ever feel anything for John and his family again.}
I continued watching that Scrubs marathon most of the night.
WRAP - Wrote the blog for today. I wrote today's Daily Page. I wrote down all the answers to the "Defining Bipolar Disorder"questions that I copied from http://www.thrivewithbipolardisorder.com/?p=2074 . I organized the WRAP Workbook again by taking out more pages and putting loose pages away.
Plans for Tomorrow I plan on getting up. I plan on accomplishing an activity for the WRAP book. I plan on taking a walk with Molly if she calls me around 6:00 pm.
{I want to change a bad habit so that I 1) Stop doing something bad 2) exchange the bad action with a positive action 3) and get a result that will help me in my life.}
A reminder: On the 19th RIBS Group is planning on meeting at 6:00 pm in the Warwick Library Room 100. I am suppose to co-chair it with Donna. CALL DONNA. Wednesday Molly plans on calling me so we can go for a walk along the Wall and maybe get some lemonade. Saturday, June 11th is Holly R.'s Birthday (Try to show up) Holly wrote me back on Facebook to say we'll get together next week if she isn't too swamped.
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